she who stays up at night

~ no shame ~
episode 8

"A smart person knows how to talk. A wise person knows when to be silent."
–  Roy T Bennett
For weeks and weeks the Owl kept calling, but too tired inside so I kept stalling. Body and joints aching, like I’d been in the wars, so I connected with Artemisia, for her energetic restores.

A sorority, female council of thirteen, although Artemis was present, Athena was keen to be seen. Shield wielding, warrior goddess, ready for battle, dressed to assess. Some struggle to escape sexual pursuit, but she’s ruled over many a sexual dispute. Sometimes shaming, blaming, cursing, forcing metamorphosising, but one soon forgets the true power of empathising.

The story of Nyctimene and her rape, transforming into Owl then became her fate. Was she too ashamed to be seen in daylight, or earnest to embody this sacred bird of the night. A symbol of wisdom and seeing in the dark, for violators often leave their mark. They say once bitten twice shy, but when one lives in truth it's reflected in eye.

The Owl had me flying down into a dark abyss, endless it seemed until I saw this. A cavern, with a master sat meditating, snaked wrapped around him decorating. It slithered on over and spiraled round the same, before tongue bursting from forehead in front of brain. Then on an operating table, a familiar spiritual sight, high surgeon working away, kaleidoscopic light. Amethyst crystal feather headdress, intuitive ability open to express. For some they hear and others they See, but develop these both for greater clarity.

The Owl's flat facial disk channels sounds to its ears, by adjusting its feathers, no nuisance noise interferes. The faintest movement, heard from hideaways, great detective of unconscious displays. Silently gliding, unseen shadow in the night, spying on all life with its binocular eyesight. Piercing through the darkness, so many different angles, offers new perspectives, old patterns now untangles.

Breaking boundaries, crossing Water lines, bypassing consent with those criminal minds. You may take this body, but it will not be me, unconsciously escaping this reality. But maybe you're here to face to face, full circle again, same frequency, different place. What voice will you hear now guiding you through, echoes in the hall of mirrors or that which rings true.

Yes, those layers from lifetimes, victims of violence in hiding, time to see the light of day, the power of now confiding. Breathe, surrender and let go, as they're lifted from your being, often suffering is how we learn, but after all these lessons can freeing.

Dear friend, the Owl's hypnotic gaze and magical super-vision, can detect your darkest secrets that govern harmful decision. Those haunting calls, now superseded by its hooting, alerting you of an intruder, your thought-stream polluting.

So to Owl and to Athena fly down with your healing, for purity of true nature truly revealing. Face that dark night and hear what it has to say, feast on its wisdom that now waves the way.

These are my own insights, but a great beauty of life is that of perspective, so how might others respond to the spirit of Owl, unbeknownst to this being the spirit they are receiving. How might they perceive it through their six senses. And the darkness within, polarised from the light, is something to embrace, not something to fight.

Whilst this podcast focuses on one story, more sharings can be read in raw after-session written form below.
* some participant names might have been changed for pen names.
* no participants were informed that it was the spirit of Owl we were working with until after they had all shared their experience of the Session.


'We are to show you to be.' Soles of feet opening. Lava moving up through legs. Fire. Glowing golden ambers. Sculpturing of the future. Reforming. Earth. Green. Blue. Deep waters. World within. Beyond the beyond. The unknowable. 'Let me take you on a journey'. Forestheart. Freedom. Magical mystical fairy worlds. A world full of wonders. Zooming out. Outer space. Galaxy of stars. Nose and ears moving. A lions face. A lions roar. Kundalini. Pandoras gift. A looooong silent scream. Tears rolling out of eyes like an overflowing lake. Deep sadness. Gaia. 'To be able to see who you really are'. Cutting open over all left body side. Something being removed. Golden filled. Floating. Weightless. Dancing in the moonlight. Less is more. Laying on a bed in the clouds. Third eye and crown opening. A beam of light. The holy mountain. Secret chambers of wisdom. Golden pillars. Pillars of light. Cathedral of light. Heart of liquid gold. Essence. Angels walking on earth. Stay in the heart. THE mothers love.


Immediately body shaking and moving, starting from solar plexus. Then I feel my womb, a hot stream moves upward, like lava, I open my mouth as to scream out fire. Then I’m in a night under the full moon. I meet the eyes of a man. Blue eyes. My heart is home immediately. We are one. Next scene is red and big activity in my womb and ovaries. Suddenly like a reversed birth I slip through my own womb into space… in a snake-Pharao-kindofshape. I understand this is my space suit as I’m only visiting, otherwise I would leave my body and return to source. So I’m weirdly floating around in source attached via a navel chord to my own womb… then I feel my mom and my heart bursts with love. I feel my dad too and suddenly I witness my own conception. It’s happening again, so I’m slipping back and birthing myself anew… feeling it in all cells of my body. Huge heart expansion and tears of joy. I see a girl and understand she is me, my inner child, and she is happy. I then understand it is an initiation. This feeling of not being here in the last weeks is because I’m inbetween worlds. The portal that is open for us women during moontime now becomes accessible all the time. A glimpse of what’s waiting there in the next chapter…. Wow!!!!!! Two days ago incredible sharp pain in my chest, I was not sure if this is a heart attack, now returning. I keep still. My heart appears as this incredibly beautiful apartment, inviting me to really move down now from the head and live there or at least hang out there more.


A lot going on Initially an elderly man and woman coming in grandfather grandmother? Not sure Left side of the body pain something being lifted worked on Right ovary sharp pain Feet warm hot Body immersed in a warm cozy feeling Moments of seeing perceiving sadness grieving tears Third eye opening going into the void black nothing dissolving into nothing A lot is been happening on the head area People old stories coming to mind -painful moments shame guilt karma -I have 4 and half fingers stop getting attached to stories . If I see I get attached so everything was moving shifting flowing flowsly no need to see or understand allowing allowing to happen Children outside and birds singing -my external environment throughout the whole healing Now -silence. Interesting things happening in different parts of the body. Sharp pain left side below ribs -that’s an old wound -witch wound , keeps coming up. Moments of purging things out of my throat feels like insects


When the session started I felt very, very tired, then a strong presence that confused me, in the lower part of my body, made me quite confused, so I connected some bad memories with it. calming waves met with waves of anxiety throughout. Left part of the body receiving warmth. At some point, gentle unwinding of the neck. I saw a very big bird's head twice, black with a long curved beak and very interesting eyes, once I also see it flying by from further, in white. I'm becoming aware of a lot of things that do not work and feel a sadness that I cannot release. Often thinking someone is standing at my bed or at the door, a bit creepy. Now heartbeat a bit stronger than usual, a bit confused, itchy face and scalp again..


Body is heavy, raised heartbeat. Slowly the body warms up, almost hot. My head is turning that far that it must get of, it’s like I hold it next to me, but it turns back. It’s like I become a hoop. The whole body in a circle; but backwards. A young woman sits in the water. She’s beautiful, then I suddenly see her fish tale. I see a candle, it shines beautiful golden light. It feels like home, it almost hypnotises me. I see a yogi kind of silhouette. Wind under my feet, cold/fresh. A dragon flies by. Dolphins. Arms are more heavy, my hands are fireballs. Also my feet feel bigger and like with fireballs under them. A seahorse. Now I’m under the water. I see myself swimming beautiful with grace and peace. Then I get dragged deeper and deeper, with high speed. The earth opens and we all fall into her. Panic for short moment; ah no; trust! I relax again. It’s dark. A man with a beard. “Let go of control thoughts” you can’t change what is supposed to be. My arms hurt when I want to tough my face. This “bug” is there long enough on my right chin. I want it gone. Sudden a deep breath, as if I come out of the water after staying almost too long without breathing. I am back, alive. My first breath. Body relaxes again and then I decide to slowly move again. My legs are still very heavy. It’s time.


I feel a Presence. I kneel in prayer. I am being prepared. Micro movements, release of tension. Especially my face, my throat. My heart space glows, expands. My arms in a wiiiiiide embrace. I cannot see my hands. Just feel the length of my arms. I am on fire. My awareness is unwavering. My body dissolves. There are no flames, yet clearly "fire". I float. My yoni buds. A full, soft, fragrant rose. Pulsing, slow vertical waves moving through my feet up. Glowing feet and heart. Fountain of life. Showering, embracing, nourishing all it touches. Returning to Earth. I am so grounded and so free. Sound moves through. My sound heals, creates. A woman invites me to come. When I move towards her, she becomes a light. A being of light. I ask: who are you?...What are your colours? Pearl green, blue and purple. Words: "sing, sing, sing" A vertical pressure between my left shoulder blade and my spine. Things need to leave. Air... I sigh, sigh, sigh... The sighs become directed sounds, rage, creation power, sighs again... Nourishment. Going through this cycle again and again. Then... rest.


Immediate pulsing of whole body. Images of water, awashed in waves of blue, then turning more intense and uncomfortable. Lost consciousness but feelings of weightlessness like a balloon drifting with the wind. Powerful.


Before tonight, I felt great healing strength and fortitude from this Spirit. Supporting me after physical illness and big workload. A Rebirth and Eyes wide Open energy. As soon as we started my throat pulsating and then itchy. Powerful tingling all over but esp hands, lips, lungs. Surrender. Then deeply felt the fortitude and strength. Soothing cleanse. Going to all my remaining weak spots. Silk healing. Diffusive. Softening. Loads in my throat and lungs. I feel a deep Devotion my body changes shape. Devotion to Love. Vast deep waters. Almost drowning. Then wow I am swimming underwater. Magical. Incredible experience. Gratitude. Feels like I am with a Dear Heart Friend. Several times these past weeks I have felt the familiarity of this Spirit. Fast moment of itchy. Then gone. Again fleeting but intense anxiety. Then deep tired wanting to curl up go to sleep. All my muscles deeply relaxed. Heart medicine. Heart healing. Heart expansion.